Outline for the NYNE Presbyterian Women’s Retreat 2023

“Laying Aside Every Weight”

In our discussion, we will explore the weights in our lives which burden us on our journey to the celestial city. We will examine them in the light of what Scripture tells us and how to lighten the load in preparation to meet Him one day in heavenly glory!

We will also look at replacing the weights in our lives which do not help us and lay up treasures in heaven with good and edifying weights of glory that nourish our souls.

Our topic today is based on the following text of Scripture, Hebrews 12:1-2

“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith, who for thejoy that was set before Him, endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.”

There is so much to be said about this passage of Scripture, let’s listen to what Matthew Henry says about this text:

a. Inordinate affection and concern for the body (definition: what does inordinate mean; extreme, going beyond a normal limit, exceeding the limits dictated by reason or good judgment)

b. Excessive care for this present life and world

c. These weights pull us down when we should ascend upward, pulls us back when we should press forward. How many of us have felt the weight of the world?

d. Makes duties and difficulties harder and heavier than they would be

Let’s identify what are some of the weights we may struggle with which pull us down to the earth when we should ascend upwards.

1. Anxiety: Proverbs 12:25 “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs it down, but a good word makes it glad.” 1 Peter 5:6-7 “Therefore humble yourselves, under the mighty hand of God that He may exhaust you in due time, casting all your care upon Him for He cares for you.”

Can anyone relate to anxiety? We certainly could have listed tens of other scriptures Matthew 6:34 “Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”

What are some practical things we can do to help us with anxiety? (John Krus book “Scripture Reference for Biblical Counseling)

• Jesus instructs us not to worry about tomorrow, about food, clothing, etc.

• Take one day at a time, and don’t borrow trouble

• Don’t be anxious, but pray

• Cast all your anxiety on the Lord

• You can discover the secret of tranquility

• Anxiety weighs a person down

Practical ideas

• Less caffeine

• “Alexa” play “David Nevue and other similar artists”

• Pandora “How Great Thou Art” radio

• Healthy Breathing Techniques (Box Breathing)

2. Our sinful thoughts and actions: Galatians 5:17 “For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish.” Hebrews 12:14 “Pursue peace with all people, and holiness, without which no one will see the Lord: looking carefully lest anyone fall short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up cause trouble and by this many become defiled.”

What are some practical helps here?

• Repent, Pray and ask the Lord for forgiveness

•    Speak with your spouse, Pastor, Christian friend about what you are going through

1.      Acting with Haste: Does this ever work out well?  Psalm 130:5-6 “I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His word do, I hope.  My soul waits for the Lord more than those who watch for the morning - Yes, more than those who watch for the morning.” John Owen on haste; To Haste; haste is the souls undue lifting up of itself, proceeding from the weariness of its condition, to press after an end of its troubles, not according to the conduct of the spirit of God. Thus, when God calls His people to waiting, He expresses the contrary acting unto this duty by the lifting up of the soul. Habakkuk 2:3-4 “For the vision is yet for an appointed time; but at the end it will speak, and it will not lie. Though it tarries, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry.”—we should act prayerfully and not hastily. Wait on the Lord and so not act hastily when faced with a need for action: Isaiah 40:31 “But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.”

•    Seek counsel

• Pray

• Wait on the Lord for clear direction

3. Money: Habakkuk was content with God’s way and trusted him even when things looked very hard. Habakkuk 3:17-19 “Though the fig tree may not blossom, nor fruit be on the vines; though the labor of the olive may fail, and the fields yield no food; though the flock may be cut off from the fold, and there be no herd in the stalls — yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will joy in the God of my salvation. The Lord God is my strength; He will make my feet like deer’s feet, and He will make me walk on my high hills.” A good point is to recognize it is all His anyway and we are just stewards of all He gives us!

4. Being distracted: with many tasks Luke 10:41-42 “And Jesus answered and said to her, 'Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But the one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part which will not be taken away from her.”

5. Work inside and/or outside the home: We look at work sometimes as a burden because let’s face it - it can be a burden. We should look at it as working unto the Lord. Be a faithful worker so that you will be a good witness to outsiders and not dependent on others. 1 Thessalonians 4:11-12 “That you also aspire to lead a quiet life, to mind your own business, and to work with your own hands, as we commanded you, that you may walk properly toward those who are outside, and that you may lack nothing”

6. Politics- we can get so hung up on what our political climate is right now. A solution is to pray for our leaders and their decisions, knowing Who is in control.

7. Children/Youth - balance between school, exercise and biblical education. Teaching them about viewing the world through the biblical lens when the world is influencing them. Maybe replace an activity with something which will help them spiritually. Again, crediting the Counseling book by John Krus…

• God requires parents to rear their children in a God-centered way. The primary objective must be that your children know, believe in, love, reverence, and serve the Lord

Parents must shepherd the child’s heart, not only discipline, not merely attempting to correct outward behavior. When anyone sins, it arises out of the heart.

8. Friends: affect us for better or for worse. Proverbs 13:20 “He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed.” Proverbs 1:15 “My son, do not walk on the way with them. Keep your feet from their path.” 1 Corinthians 15:33 “Do not be deceived, evil company corrupts good habits.”

“Walk a few steps in the path of sin and your life’s direction may be settled.” John A. Kitchen II. That’s very frightening….

Scripture Reference for Counseling

• Stay away from a foolish man

• Don’t make friends with a hot-tempered man

• A godly friend can be of great help

• Jonathan and David had an ideal friendship 1 Samuel 20:17 “And Jonathan, Saul’s son made David swear again by his love for him, for he loved him as he loved his own soul”

10. Beauty and Clothing - Proverbs 31:30-31: “Charm is deceitful, and beauty is passing, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her the fruit of her hands, and let her own works praise her in the gates.” Aspiring to be a Proverbs 31 woman!

11. Physical Weight - studies are coming out which discuss less about weight and more about having a healthy body. Do all you can to take care of the body He has given us.

12. Striving for Perfection- does anyone struggle with this perfectionism? It is a heavy weight on us trying to be something we are not as there was only one who was perfect, the Lord Jesus!

13. People pleasing - Remember your “Biblical World” view. Do we really care about what the world says about us or what our Heavenly Father says about us?

14. Self-Pity: Jonah became angry and was filled with self-pity, for which God rebuked him. Jonah 4:3-4 “Therefore now, O Lord, please take my life from me, for it is better for me to die than to live.” And the Lord said, “Do you do well to be angry?” Self-pity, navel gazing, etc. does not acknowledge God’s sovereignty in our lives.

15. Our Past: better times, regrets and bad decisions; the “what if’s” - remember if it was meant to be it would have happened, our Lord is Sovereign.

16. Fear of the Future: (it will get worse)

Comment: What are we saying here; we can’t do anything about the weights, they exist, but we CAN do something about the way they affect us!

17. Being too busy to think about the Lord: Don’t rob God of your time and talents, Malachi 3:8 “Will a man rob God? Yet you have robbed Me! But you say, ‘In what way have we robbed You”’ In tithes and offerings.” Here is a brief excerpt from William Jay Morning Exercises March 11: “Can he be so daring? To rob a Being so high and sacred, and whose glory so enhances the offense? To injure a fellow subject is felony; but to injure a King is treason. To steal from a man in injustice; but to steal from God is a sacrilege…. who has not robbed God of property? Our wealth is not our own, we are only stewards. Who has not robbed God of time?” Have we not often robed him of much of this, perhaps of all, by worldly accounts, by evil company, by idle visits, by doing our own ways, and finding our own pleasure. Who has not robbed Him of the heart? This was made for Him and He demands it:” My son (or daughter) give me thine heart.”

18. Sinful Anger: Anger is not itself sinful. Psalm 7:11 “God is a just judge, and God is angry with the wicked every day." Be slow to become angry. Proverbs 14:16-17 “A wise man fears and departs from evil, but a fool ranges and is self-confident. A quick-tempered man acts foolishly, and a man of wicked intentions is hated.”

19. Unbelief and Lack of Trusting the Lord: - The Lord is the believer’s refuge and strength. Psalm 91:1-2 “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in His will I trust.”

These weights can be a real hindrance, and we certainly did not name them all. Let’s think about this; none of us know how much time we have left on this earth. If you assess yourself and if He were to come back tomorrow and take us home, do you feel ready to meet Him? Do you feel you have unfinished business you didn’t get to?

How many of you feel at the end of some days, or most days that you didn’t accomplish much, you were not able to leap tall buildings in a single bound? The huge number of tasks you were able to get through in a single day just didn’t happen and you feel defeated. Would you change anything in the way you do things?

How can we run the race with all this baggage and weight?

• This is the key - to identify the weights which do not serve us and replace them with good weights, such as faith.

We want to run the race with endurance, how do we do it? Run with Jesus. It is a Marathon and not a sprint! If we want to “win the race” to be the best version of ourselves we can be before the Lord, we need to examine what we are doing, review the activity, maybe look at it in another way, possibly replace it or revise it. If we continue to engage and indulge ourselves in these weights, they will weigh our spiritual life down, and we may not do well in this race the Lord has set before us.

How are we preparing to run this race?

*What if we were to look at this a little differently. If we were to measure our accomplishments on a given day in terms of how much did I nourish my soul today? How would that benefit you? As a result, measuring how much closer you are to the Lord in your spiritual walk? How many times have you reflected on our heavenly Father and His heavenly kingdom today or even this week?

Now we are going to learn a little more about how we can do well in this race, Matthew Henry has a few comments to say.

Perfective: Matthew Henry Run with patience the race that is set before us. The apostle speaks in the gymnastic style, taken from the Olympic and other exercises.

1. Christians have a race to run, a race of service and a race of sufferings, a course of active and passive obedience.

2. This race is set before them; it is marked out unto them, both by the word of God and the examples of the faithful servants of God, that cloud of witnesses with which they are compassed about. It is set out by proper limits and directions; the mark they run to, and the prize they run for, are set before them.

3. This race must be run with patience and perseverance. There will be need of patience to encounter the difficulties that lie in our way, of perseverance to resist all temptations to desist or turn aside. Faith and patience are the conquering graces and therefore must always be cultivated and kept in lively exercises. Matthew Henry’s Commentary

Now let’s spend some time discussing replacing or revising some of what we already do and redirect it for our edification, spending more time in prayer, reading Christian books, Scripture, sermons, reflecting, memorizing meditating on the Word to encourage our souls applies for all of these - so that is a given.

Treasures in Heaven (Good replacements/weights)

Matthew 6:19-21” Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and thieves break in and steal; But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”

1. Repentance: Matthew 3:8 “Therefore bear fruits worthy of repentance.” (Credit John Krus for the following comments)

• Jesus calls needy sinners to repentance that leads to salvation

• Repentance must be from the heart, genuine

• There is joy in heaven over one sinner who repents Luke 16:7 “I say to you likewise there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine just persons who need no repentance.”

• Return to the Lord and he will return to you

• If God’s people turn away from their wicked ways, he will forgive them. 2 Chronicles 7:14 “If my people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land.”

2. This is a good weight! Chastisement: (John Krus)

• God disciplined and tried his people on their journey to the promised land

• Not all affliction is for specific sins. God often sends affliction to purify and strengthen his children. Job did not get angry at God (which would have been a sinful reaction) and he was severely tried; he lost his possessions. Rather, he accepted it by faith and worshipped Him.

• God at times sends trials to develop patience in us

• The psalmist was thankful for affliction, for it taught him to keep God’s precepts

• We must neither make light of God’s disciple nor lose heart because of it

• God disciplines His children to promote sanctification

• God disciplined and tried his people on their journey to the promised land to teach them important lessons.

Hebrews 12: 5-11 “And you have forgotten the exhortation which speaks to you as sons: the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” My son do not despise the chastening of the Lord, nor be discouraged when you are rebuked by Him; For whom the Lord loves, He chastens and scourges every son whom He receives. If you endure chastening, God deals with you as sons; for what son is there whom a father does not chasten. But if you are without chastening, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate and not sons. Furthermore, we have had human fathers who corrected us, and we paid them respect. Shall we not much more readily be in subjection to the Father of spirits and live? For they indeed for a few days, chastened us as seemed best to them, but He for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness. Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.”

3. Prayer: Ephesians 6:17-18 “And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints."

Quote from Thomas Watson on Prayer:

“It is a saying of one of the ancients, “The saints carry the keys of Heaven at their belt” Prayer opens the door of Heavens, and takes the blessings from God’s hand” and Studying Scripture: 2 Timothy 3:16-17 “All Scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.”

Thomas Guthrie, 1803-1873

“Not every believer may feel as if he were alone with God - enjoying a private audience with the King in His presence-chamber! Be of good cheer. Every groan of your wounded heart; your every sigh, and cry, and prayer- falls as distinctly on Jesus’ ear as if you stood beside His throne, or, nearer still, lay with John on His bosom, and felt the beating of His heart against your own!”

4. Memorizing Scripture: (personal story of running/walking with index card) Isaiah 53 and Psalm 139. Even though it may be a mundane activity, we should ask ourselves how we can bring spiritual life into it?

5. Meditate on the Lord: Philippians 4:8-9 “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy — meditate on these things. The things which you learned and received and heard and saw in me, these do, and the God of peace will be with you.” What are some activities we can do while meditating? Driving, Housework, Walking, Resting, etc.

6. Observe the Lord at work in your life in every situation: Psalm 1:2 “But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and in His law, he meditates day and night.” We can recognize the Lord is Sovereign and He is allowing and causing things to occur in our lives and activities to bring about His purposes. A good idea would be to ask yourself what the Lord may be doing here in this situation. What lessons are there for me? Am I being patient, prayerful and seeking His will?

2 Corinthians 4:17-18

“For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.

7. Try to live more days like a Sunday Think each day as consecrated to the Lord, not just on Sunday, have fellowship with Him, pray and read scriptures; be renewed and refreshed! At some point we will be enjoying endless Sundays with Him.

“He is the finisher of our faith; He is the fulfiller and the fulfilling of all scripture-promises and prophecies; he is the perfecter of the Canon of scripture; He is the finisher of grace, and of the work of faith with power in the souls of his people; and He is the judge and the rewarder of their faith; He determines who they are that reach the mark, and from Him, and in Him, they have the prize.” Matthew Henry

“The crosses and comforts of this present time would not make such an impression upon us as they do if we did but believe the things of eternity as we ought.” C.H. Spurgeon

What applications can we take from our study today? I am going to mention some then invite anyone who would like to share a take a way. (Interaction based on time left in the class and level of participation)

Applications:

1. Have an awareness of what you are doing and why you are doing it. Ask yourself….

2. Can I improve on anything I am doing to bring more glory to God

3. Can I turn this mundane or necessary task into something more edifying to my soul

4. Write down some activities you are questioning, pray about them and ask the Lord to “realign” them if He thinks it is better for you. Applications I felt applied from a Sermon on Adoption by Pastor Rob Ventura (used with permission)

1. Regularly reflect on the teaching of scripture and meditate upon what He did for you as a daughter.

2. Repent of all sin regularly to keep your communion with God. We need to be sure we are repenting of all sin! Cherish your communion with God above all else. That should be the greatest delight in your life.

3. Rejoice that you are His child and all things work together for good !

Summary Statement:

Today we worked at identifying the “weights” which slow us down on our spiritual walk or even hinder us, we have identified some of them.

We also looked at replacing those weights with more profitable activities for the soul which if we spent more time in them, we would be happier, less anxious, less distracted, resulting in more focus on heavenly things.

Let’s close with this Scripture passage and then our closing prayer.

Colossians 1:9-12

“For this reason we also, since the day we heard it, do not cease to pray for you, and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and long-suffering with joy; giving thanks to the Father who has qualified us to be partakers of the inheritance of the saints in the light.”

Closing Prayer

Past Women's Conferences

"The Portrait of an Extraordinary Woman"

"Laying Aside Every Weight"

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